I've realized a couple of things in the past days.

I almost wanted to break, and nearly did. When music wafted through the air in one of my classes, I nearly cried.

The semester is ending, and things are going to change once and again. I don't know if that is going to ever falter, no matter how much strain I put on it.

Not yet, God. Please.

Book fair yesterday was made of pure, unaldultered awesome. 8D

We got there early to find a parking spot, since MOA was gonna have the 'As 1' concert, which was thoroughly going to fill the whole mall space if we didn't get there on time.

Tokyo Tokyo mayhem ensued. I honestly think the part of the restaurant where we were staying was against us. Noise level was over 9000. XD Waited for around 12:30, then we started the NBS raid in SMX.

Will post a picture of my hoard from yesterday. =D

Danna seemed to have horded more than I did this time. She was pretty fast, the minute she came she found like 10 books right off the shelves. She also seemed conflicted on what to buy. Lol.

Fast forward to dinner, we ran to Sbarro and back to SMX to check out our stuff from the counters and see Oujo run really fast to claim an order. That was the exercise of the day!

Day at MOA ended with Hanna's cellphone getting flushed down the toilet and into the sewers. Now the toilet has its own ringtone. =P

Car ride home was the highlight of the day. You just to be there. :D

When I woke up today, I wanted to kill something. Maul, gut, and smear blood on the wall.

Italian class has driven me crazy. Anger isn't one of my best controlled emotions. I will say what I want when I'm angry, and most often I regret them.

I regret not being with the class last night to practice. What I don't regret though is being who I am.

I don't do dresses unless I need to. I don't do make up either. Heels and earrings are fine with me though, go figure. And for fuck's sake I loathe performing on stage.

I'm deathly afraid of standing in front of so many people, familiar or unfamiliar. I do not perform well. My nervousness goes beyond chattering and trembling, and beyond freezing up. Hell, I just lose all sense of self and presence of mind.

Yet I am thankful for my class. They work hard, and bear with my unpleasant behavior. They bear my heated rants and uncouth behavior. It is rare for people to do that, with me as a very inconvenient presence and I greatly appreciate them for it. I owe the people that tolerate me.

I know I've pissed some off along the way. I may have pissed off everyone and not even know it - that is my level of density sometimes, and I still can not learn to overcome it. I am grateful for their patience.

And now I think today is a good day, though I am still filled with dread at the wrath of my class for my harsh and thoughtless words. I fear people.

But there was pizza and iced tea, and I am thankful.

All's well in the world.

I almost tripped in the school halls today, but I managed to stop myself.

I had startled someone and quickly apologized, and continued on.

Later, I realized  I had apologized to a cat.









I'm effin' serious.



8Da?

I've finally gotten over my childhood fear of the Harry Potter series, no thanks to an elementary teacher. And an incident that involved the first movie, for that matter. I still can't bring myself to look at Quirrel without trauma and that urge to hide under my bedsheets and curl up into a ball.

Stupid Conditioned Stimulus.

Also, I must admit I've finished the whole HP series through Wikipedia months before this post, but only now have bothered to check fics. (Shame on me.) I'll try to find the hardback edition of the first book for a test drive.

It is also possible I've finally gotten over my slump in grades, yet I doubt this is going to last long. Italian class has driven me to depression more than once. It'll be back, I know it. Finding solace in my books has been generally helping, but now I can't put anything down. Damn you, National sale.

Wasted a lot of money for the pas t few days. Started when my decision to go to NBS Katipunan led me to buy The Amber Spyglass by Pullman at a really low price. It was the deluxe edition, mind. So here's my current laundry list:


The Amber Glass by Phillip Pullman  

Tokyo Babylon Vol. 2                         

Suki Vol. 1                                              

The Legend of Chun-Hyang              

Promise Me by Harlan Coben           

The Woods by Harlan Coben            

Just One Look by Harlan Coben        

The Innocent by Harlan Coben           

Interworld by Gaiman and Reeves

I've spent a lot on these, but surprisingly, not as much as I expected. Only spent P1,590 flat. All hail Booksale and NBS? The Harlan Coben books seem to be following me wherever I go. I'm finding them everywhere now - disturbing.


Anyway, I have to write in my journal. In Italian. For class. Ten sentences minimum. It's proving to be frustrating, when my sentence construction skills are abysmal.

It's gotten very tempting to do no work at all.


I am grateful, though, that our professor decided to pass all of us in Italian 10. How thin the line I am close to failing is what I'm worried about this sem.

Enjoying chem is a good sign, yes? Those electron configurations are albeit a tad bit fun.

I should realize by now that a blog is used to tap your thoughts on a keyboard and it, in turn, electronically sends signals to the screen to make what the hell I'm typing available for me to view on screen.

A blog is also made for rants, but only on occasion. (This I realize, is my greatest fault as a blogger and as a yapper.)

I still do not know, I am afraid, how to blog properly. I feel the need to announce this to the world for no reason, which is the purpose of blogging.










Also, this is a random post because I would rather not make people's eyes bleed with another academic, non-exciting hurdle in my life.

I'm also considering to join the Red Cross Youth.

I probably should find myself some really good transportation in the near future. Hitched a ride with a person who I didn't really talk to during high school, which was freaky and embarrassing on my part. D:

Chemistry exam was moved twice, and we're having the exam instead on Monday. I should note that I haven't passed an exam as of now. Two failures and one that barely made it. Serves as a reminder that being apathetic is really that bad. Especially on Italian. I don't feel anything for the bloody subject, and with a borderline failure on the horizon, I don't think I'll ever be in UPMed. D: Or even a moderately good school that would take me in because of that 5.0.

I just can't seem to find any interest in Italian, besides the food and coffee. Or maybe it's just the way its taught. My other classmates well admit it too.

One thing that surprised me for the past few days is that chemistry doesn't hate me like it used to. Well, until I came across the half-life equations and my brain totally blew to a bust. But I finally learned NBE, and didn't expect to get it. I was expecting it to be harder than half-life.

So now I have opted to skip half life and go on to simpler equations till I come across titration, which I will kill myself over once again.

Did I mention I had until midnight to understand 3/5 more of the lesson plan before the exam?

Not being a freshie kinda sucks, you lack that drive to study to become that "shining" university student some always have wanted to be. All I worry about now is how I'll pass, especially that dammed Italian. It doesn't help that the professor is confusing the hell outta the whole class.

I miss my freshman ambition.

I'm not apathetic anymore, but I've returned to my old high school habits.

Ah, there will be blood in the near future. I can feel it.

I'm still procrastinating, and watching Prince Caspian over on Star Movies. I'm doubting that I'll ever get around finally studying some chemistry after someone asked me to confirm if our exam was moved to July 27.

Bloody hell, I have to start studying for real. Italian midterms part two coming up as well. Bright side is we're studying Jackson Pollock over at Art Studies 2, and I'm having the most wonderful time looking at hos works.

All I have to do now is to download the movie because our viewing got cut ff by the typhoon.

I've been pretty apathetic lately. Haven't been taking any of my subjects seriously, especially Italian,  and it's scaring me.  Never been like this in UPM, but there I had motivation. So yeah, I need to be miserable to study.

Anyway, not blogging lately cuz I've been busy, and I'll be off to study Chemistry 16 in a while, but here, have a kitty:

( A tomato will fly towards you if don't click this. )




The image is linked back, don't worry. I just love faboarts. =D